作者：Jon Jones

我是一个美术外包工作室的经理，每天都和自由职业美术师打交道。接下来我要详细地谈谈从全职美术师变成自由职业美术师的7条戒律，这些是我从多年工作中总结出来的经验。

我说的内容针对的是打算转为彻底的自由美术师的人，而不是同时兼两份工的人或者在找到工作以前临时兼职的人。当然，某些建议仍然适用于这类人。但我不太想和兼职人员合作，因为一旦他们找到正式的工作，他们就会冷落我这边的工作，这样我可能会误了交工期、影响客户的项目。

言归正传，这是我的背景：我从事合约外包工作已经近15年，曾任全职工作者超过10年。我曾是一个美术工作室的自由美术师，曾经作为美术师和经理供职于一个开发商，现在我自己带领一支自由职业美术团队。我接触过游戏美术合约工作的方方面面。

我想提醒大家重要的一点：坚持更新自己的简历和作品集。注意工作室的动向。如果接近交工期，更要注意，因为这是裁员的关键时期。你觉得这游戏会成功还是会失败？你的团队是不是太臃肿？你的合约是否需要续签？现在就准备吧。签一份约或一份工平均至少需要一个月或半个月的时间，那还算是乐观的。请提前准备。如果你被裁员了，你应该有一份简历和作品集在手，而且上面至少记录了十家公司的工作经历。

第1条戒律

建立一个自己的专用工作场所，除了用于工作，其他什么也别干。最基本的，不要在你玩的地方工作，否则你会觉得你一直在工作，然后会开始心生怨念。相信我，那会很糟的。

另外，不要在你工作的地方玩。不要把玩和工作混在一起。当有一大堆家务要干、一档节目要看、《天际》要玩、宠物要耍或一帮人想找你聊天，你会什么工作也做不了。要把这些事放在其他场所，在其他休息时间做。绝对要把休闲场所跟神圣的工作场所区分开，这是一个原则问题。这么做会让你保持清醒。

我自己的做法是把自己唯一的卧室变成办公室，把床挪到客厅。我承认这么做是极端了，不过对我个人很管用。

第2条戒律

你应该有时间观念。

业余：“我要2个小时就做完！”结果8个小时后才交工。

专业：“我会在8个小时内完成！”结果只用了6个小时。

经理的观点：如果美术师总是拖延时间，那么我会怀疑他的工作能力。我总是注意和记着这点。我不想思考“业余美工的算术题”，不想在头脑里转换：2小时=8小时，4小时=12小时，1天=2天。我不是钟点工也不是数学家。我还要赶交工期呢！

我曾经遇到过一个不改正自己的行为、但我又不能把换掉的人，所以我不得不在交工期上对他说谎，因为我知道如果我告诉他真正的交工期，他总是会拖延。显然我不能告诉他我说谎了，因为他会不断要求我宽限他、给他自己找借口，这样就误了我的交工期了。如果你让我把你当小孩子看，那别怪我这么对你。有时候这也是让美术师及时交工的唯一办法，这让我不得不充当临时父母的角色。如果他总是不明白一项任务需要花多少时间，那我要怎么评价他的工作态度和能力呢？这种人你还想跟他合作吗？

我理解有时候你确实遇到问题了。那没关系。但如果你赶不及了，请告诉我。相信我，我知道把噩耗告诉别人是一件很难的事。但我宁可提前知道，这样我好早有准备，而不是误了交工期才听说。我上头也有个BOSS。我得向我的BOSS交代，告诉我的BOSS什么时候能交差。如果我不能按时交差，BOSS会怀疑我管理团队或规划工作的能力。没人希望被这么看待，这也会直接影响到你！

我真心希望你能提前告诉我你来不及了。我不喜欢迟到的“惊喜”。事实上，毫无通知的迟到总是让我恼火。如果因为我对你的信任，你却让我在我的BOSS面前变成傻子，你觉得我还会信任你、再次跟你合作吗？当然不会。二话不说，我会立马解雇你，因为换掉你没什么大不了。无论你多强悍，工作仍然是工作。所以，请专业一点。

第3条戒律

你应该牢记技术指标上的话。

业余：“交差！”结果让我花了好几个小时修正文件的技术错误。贴图贴错了、文件名称不对、路径也不对，完全乱作一团。

专业：“这是成品！”文件命名正确、贴图合适，达到技术指标，我不用作任何修改，因为他已经按我的指示完成得很好了。

经理的观点：我不知道业余人员没读文件，或者根本不理解。如果我解释得不清楚，那我认了。但是，你可以问我。我从最满意到基本满意的三个选择如下：

1、 我亲自向他重申。告诉他再读读文件，希望他自己会领悟。但是，如果他做不到，可能会导致误工。省时间但高风险。

2、我亲自向他解释。写一份详尽的变更列表，告诉他到底怎么修改。风险一般，费时较多。

3、我自己修改。低风险，但超费时。

理想的情况下，这种事不会发生。但事实上，完全可能发生。

不要让我做你的工作。我尊重关注细节、知道自己做好自己的事的人。请理解我的底线，不要浪费我的时间。这才是好的客户服务、好的业务往来、专业的工作方式。

确实，人无完人，再完美的人也会出错。有时候我不得不更改文件名、修修补补。如果只是很小的问题，我自己改正比通告你来得快，那么我会自己动手。我可能甚至不会提出来。但如果问题太多并且总是发生，很费我的时间，那就让我火大了。这是业余的表现。这让我们双方都不好过，我会因此考虑是否再和你合作。

请彻底地清查你自己的工作，注意我给你的指示，表现得专业一点。经理可能不会将这些作为与你续约的原因之一，但请相信我，这确实是主要因素。

第4条戒律

你应该牢记客户的话。

业余：“当然，我会接受反馈的！”结果把我说的话漏听了一半，还表现得跟什么也没发生一样。他是没读、没理解还是忘了？

专业：“当然，我会接受反馈的！”他记下了我说的每一条每一点，并且！每一条每一点都改正了。

经理的观点：归结为两点：1）专业人士会让我看到他注意到我说的话；2）他关注细节并且做得很好。

好好计划。我必须有时间检验成果，然后提出意见。如果在晚上7点结束工作日，那么回到家以后我还要花时间做，这对我很不好，是吧？特别是如果我还有个很紧张的交工期。

这会导致的结果就是：失信和逾期。我越早收到你许诺的成品，我越开心。但是，如果当我得到毫无用处的成品的时候，你估计过高，对我有什么好处呢？我可以熬夜工作——想想我会喜欢这样吗？或者我可以推迟到第二天早上吗？

记住：你不是流水线的终端。你是这个流程中的重要一环。然而，还有其他排在你之后的人要接手你的成果然后继续完善它。这需要花时间，像这种流水线式的工作，只要有一人出了差子，就会影响到下一阶段的许多人。不要成为项目血管中的胆固醇，给大家添堵。

业余人员容易懈怠、误解某些意思，不愿意二次检查，得过且过，不想被麻烦，怕多做事。也许他不会接到通知，所有事都被内部处理了。但那是因为客户可能不想提，并不意味着他没注意到或不记得。这完全应该提出来，但他们可能没有时间或不想为难你。

个人认为，我不怕为难，如果我不得不面对，我会接受，因为我有这个职责。我不喜欢这么做，你也不希望这样的结局。给我们彼此都省省时间和麻烦吧。表现得专业一点，要让客户觉得“嗯，他做得好！”不要让客户觉得你太业余，觉得“呃，他完成了A、C和E，但忘了B和D。现在我得写下来或者自己修正，好吧，我现在的工作堆得像山了！”

你可能不会意识到的重要一点是：有时候，注意是有时候，工作出色的迹象是消无声息的。一切都顺利进行，正如期望的那样，大家都很高兴，没有人抱怨。把工作做好了可能并不会得到承认或赞扬，但做不好必然会招来人前的警告。我花了许多年才意识到，有时候，不被注意反而是件值得骄傲的事。我非常努力地去承认和欣赏一切，但我有太多事要忙，总是没有时间。牢记这点会让你神智清醒。

第5条戒律

你应该重视你的客户和自己的声誉。

业余：“我只是个搞美术的。什么客户服务？我画好画就好了，这才是最重要的事，他们要的不就是这个嘛。”

专业：“我是提供服务的人，我要严肃对待客户服务。我是美术师，但我的成功取决于创造达到客户要求的作品。”

经理的观点：你的工作是为客户提供服务。要对客户的要求敏感，要让客户满意，要保持一贯良好的服务态度。

许多出身于工作室的美术师并不担心做其他事，除了被指名要求做什么事。因为令人不满的表现而被知解雇是很难的，所以很多小毛病是可以蒙混过关的（注：其实所有人都注意到了，即使他们并没有表现出来）。

这非常像约会。你化好妆，穿得光鲜亮丽，让自己看起来像是约会的样子，好吸引约会的对象。但是当你们确定的关系，你就开始马虎了事，因为你现在安全了。合约商就是这样做的，其实他们不应该这样。

这就是成为自由职业者和全职员工的区别。作为自由合约工作者，你总是在结约。你总是在出售。你总是要高度关注细节，要沉着冷静，要让客户满意，这样你才能与客户保持地长期合作。就好像客户喜欢花，你就不断地给客户送花。

第6条戒律

你不应该苍白无力的借口愚弄客户。

业余：“狗狗吃了我的笔！”

专业：“我把球掉在上面了，我会全力以赴改好的。”

经理的观点：我不想听借口，我只要结果。如果你搞砸了，那就诚实大方地告诉我，我好有个准备。我听过各种各样的借口。我知道原因和借口的区别。

我见过很多不可思议的问题，结果都能巧妙地解决，所以如果坦白地告诉我，我或许可以帮助你。

啥？你不是已经回复了么，怎么还说没收到邮件？

好吧，你妻子或女朋友强烈要求你不要太拼命。（好理由！）

对我而言，当我犯了错误，我会自己承担。搞砸了，我会难受。但编一套站不住脚的借口只会让别人觉得我靠不住、草率，这是侮辱客户的智商。

借口和正当的理由的区别是很明确的。虽然有时候也很难说清。但如果找借口的次数多了，那就危险了。因为你会很容易开解自己“这些都是正当的理由！说得在理，他们肯定会完全理解我，彻底原谅我的。”但错误越多，我越难再信任你，无论你的理由是否充分。

不要成为错误制造机。但如果你确实犯了个错，那就改正它。我并不需要时时知道事情的来龙去脉，我只需要知道那是个错误和你会改正它。说实话，我只想要结果和坦白，这样我才能理清状况，找到解决方案，调整工作时间表，重新规划，以免延误进度。

第7条戒律

你应该开始有一个网站和一个好域名。

1、you@yourname.com这种格式的email是专业的。其他的，你只能用webmail、Gmail。Hotmail、Yahoo、MSN等都是业余的表现。

2、用.com，次一点用.net。

3、尽量避免奇怪的顶级域名。也不要用子域名。

反例：“ieatpaper.iamaprofessionalartist.co.xxx.nz.abc.123.omg”

4、如果你不使用真名，那就用简单一点的名称。如果你大声喊出名字，人们会不会马上记住？

反例：“Superdeliciousartistboythatmakesart.com/portfolio/lookatmeIamcreative!!11/”

5、避免网络粗话。

反例：“lolwutplsbesrs.net”

6、避免糟糕的拼写。

反例：“imaektehthreedeemodelz.net”

7、如果你必须使用连字符，只能用一个。

反例：“c-o-n-c-e-p-t-artist.com”

8、避免复杂的拼写。

反例：“www.archaeologicalartisan.com”

9、避免无意义的拼写。

反例：www.FerrethAndJobs.com（这个是真的，不过是家法律事务所）

10、如果需要3秒以上的时间说出并解释你的域名，那就太长了。

反例：我的网站是incompatenceingameduhvelopment.com，不过，‘incompetence’是‘i-n-c-o-m-p-a，这样比较有趣……”

11、避免攻击性的拼写。如果你的域名和毒品、性、粪便、传染病或者五分钱乐队有关，那么你的生活真是令人“浮想联篇”啊。

反例：“snotinmyhair.com”

12、简短最好。

典例：“chrisholden.net” 、“autodestruct.com” 和“twotongraphics.com”

第8条戒律

你应该知道并且热爱你的网络工具。（本文为游戏邦/gamerboom.com编译，拒绝任何不保留版权的转载，如需转载请联系：游戏邦）

From Full-Time to Freelance: The Seven Commandments of Contracting

by Jon Jones

Hi everybody! I’m Jon Jones and I run smArtist, a contract art production agency. I’m a freelance art outsourcing manager, and I deal with art studios and freelance artists on a daily basis. I’m going to go into some detail on what you need to know if you’re transitioning from fulltime employment into a career as a freelance artist. There are a few things you need to know that I’ve learned over the years.

First, I’ve done a 10-minute speech on this. Video link here. And here are the slides of the speech.

I’m going to be speaking primarily to people that are taking the leap into freelance art fulltime, and not people that moonlight or only want to contract until they find another job. Some of my advice will still apply to people in those situations, sure. But I prefer not working with moonlighters or people that only want to contract temporarily, because the second they enter crunch or get a job, I become the lowest priority, I miss deadlines, and it affects my clients’ projects.

Without further ado, here’s my background: I’ve been dealing with contract art for nearly fifteen years, and have been a full-time professional for over ten. I’ve been a freelance artist and worked at an art studio, worked inhouse at developers as an artist and as a manager, and now I manage art teams as a freelancer. I’ve been on all sides of the contract art game, and that’s where I’m coming from.

A quick but important note I’d like to make: Always keep your resume and portfolio up to date. Pay attention to what’s happening at your studio. If you’re getting close to shipping, get ALL of that up to date, because that’s prime time for layoffs. Do you think the game is going to succeed or suck? Is your team unreasonably large? Is your contract up for renewal? Prepare NOW. Starting a contract or a job will take at least a month and a half on average, and that’s optimistic. Be ready. If you get laid off, you have a resume and portfolio ready and they should already be in the hands of AT LEAST ten companies by the end of the day. Period.

THE ZEROTH COMMANDMENT

Set up your own dedicated workspace. Do nothing but work there. Fundamentally, just don’t work where you play. You’ll feel like you’re always at work and will begin to really resent it and feel trapped. Trust me, it sucks.

Also, don’t play where you work. Just don’t mix it. You’ll never get any work done when there’s chores around the house to do, a TV show to watch, more Skyrim, pets to play with, or the promise of Hot Local Teens In Your Area That Want To Chat. (not true.) Do that somewhere else, on your own time. Set aside your own sacred workspace and keep that discipline. It’ll keep you sane.

What I did was turn my only bedroom into my office and put my bed in my living room. I’ll admit that it’s extreme, but that’s my personality and this works well for me.

THE FIRST COMMANDMENT

Thou shalt know the day and the hour.

Amateur: “I’ll have it done in two hours!” Delivers it in eight hours.

Professional: “I’ll have it done in eight hours.” Delivers it in six hours.

Manager Insight: If an artist blows his time estimates consistently, it erodes my trust in his ability to deliver at all. I always notice and remember. I don’t want to have to figure out “Amateur Artist Math” and do the conversions in my head: 2h = 8h, 4h = 12h, one day = two days. I am neither nanny nor mathematician. I have deadlines to hit!

I’ve been in a position where I’ve been stuck with an artist that won’t correct his behavior and that I can’t replace, so I actually have to lie about when it’s due just because I know he’ll be late if I give him the real due date. And obviously I can’t tell him I do that, because he’ll be onto me and will find another way to weasel out of it, once again leaving me in the dark on delivery dates. If you make me treat you like a child, no allowance for you. Sometimes that has been the only way to get the artist to deliver it on time, and this puts me in an odd and almost parental position. What does it say about him, his competence and his skills as an artist if he consistently fails to understand how long a task takes? Is that someone you’d work with again?

I understand that sometimes you run into problems. That’s fine. But if you’re going to be late,tell me. Trust me, I know how awkward it can be to approach someone pre-emptively and tell them something unpleasant. But I’d rather know so I can plan for it being late than simply not hear from the artist and get a late delivery. I have a boss, too. I report to my boss, and telling my boss it’ll be done on a certain day and getting it later makes me look like I can’t manage my artists or stick to a schedule. No one wants to feel that way, and that affects you directly, too!

I appreciate honesty and giving advance notice that you will be late. I do not like being surprised by a late delivery with no warning. In fact, that always irritates me. If you make me look like an idiot to my boss because I trusted you, do you think I would ever trust you or want to work with you again? Of course not. I’d cut you loose without a second thought because it is in my direct, immediate interest to replace you. No matter how cool a person you are, this is still business. Be a Professional.

THE SECOND COMMANDMENT

Thou Shalt Heed the Words of the Technical Guidelines Tablet.

Amateur: “Here’s the delivery!” File’s a technical MESS I’ll spend hours fixing. Textures assigned wrong, files named wrong, directories assigned wrong, total chaos. Bonus points for weird or profane filenames. (note: Not actual bonus points.)

Professional: “Here’s the delivery!” Files are properly named, textures are properly assigned, technical guidelines were met and I don’t have to fix anything because he paid attention to my instructions.

Manager’s Insight: I don’t know if the Amateur just didn’t read the doc, or if he simply didn’t understand it. If I explained it badly, I’ll cop to it. But please, try your best and ask questions.
My three options in order from most desirable to least desirable are as follows:

a) Repeat myself. Tell him to reread the doc and hope he suddenly gets it. However, this could be another blown deliverable if he doesn’t. High risk, very little time spent.
b) Explain myself. Write up a detailed changelist and tell him exactly how to fix it. Medium risk, lots of time spent.
c) Do it myself. Low risk, excessive time spent.

Ideally, this will never happen. Practically speaking, it totally will.

Don’t make me do your job. I respect attention to detail and people that think of ways to do their job well, understand my bottom line, and try to save me time. It’s good customer service, good business and the Professional way to act. It’s the mint on the pillow.

Honestly, no one’s perfect. Sometimes I’ll have to rename a file here, tweak some verts there. That happens. If it’s just one or two issues small enough that it would be faster for me to fix them myself rather than telling you, I may just do that. It’s likely that a client may not even mention it. But if there are a lot of issues like this and it happens consistently, that’s more work for me, and it’s going to really irritate me over time. This is Amateur hour nonsense. It makes us both look bad, and will make me rethink working with you again. Your mom doesn’t work here. Clean up your own mess.

Be thorough, check your own work, pay attention to the directions I give you, and be a Professional. A manager may not mention this as being one of the reasons he continues to send you contract work, but trust me, it is a major factor.

THE THIRD COMMANDMENT

Thou shalt heed thy client’s word to the letter.

Amateur: “Sure, I’ll incorporate that feedback!” Misses half of what I asked for and acts like nothing’s wrong. Did he not read it, not understand it or just ignore it?

Professional: “Sure, I’ll incorporate that feedback!” Nails every single point spot-on and (as a bonus!) verifies point-by-point what was fixed.

Manager’s Insight: This comes down to two points: 1) The Professional is showing me he pays attention to what I say, and 2) he’s focused on details and doing a good job.

Plan for this. I need time to review the assets and generate feedback. If my workday ends at 7pm and I get it long after I’ve gone home, that doesn’t do me a lot of good, does it? Especially if I have an imminent deadline.

This all comes down to this timeless adage: Under-promise and over-deliver. The earlier in the day I get a delivery you’ve promised, the happier I am. But if you dramatically overestimate when I’ll get the asset and I get it uselessly late, what good is that to me? I can either stay late at work — guess how much I like that? — or put it off until tomorrow morning.

Remember: You are not the end of the pipeline. You’re an important part of the process, yes. However, other people are lined up after you take your finished product to the next stage of production and finalize it. This takes time, and issues like this pile up and affect a lot of other people down the chain. Do not be the cholesterol in the artery of my project.
It’s easy for an Amateur to slack off, misread something, not double-check, or just let things slide and hope he’s not called on it because he doesn’t want to do the extra work. Maybe he doesn’t get called on it and it’s handled in-house. But just because a client may not bring it up doesn’t mean it wasn’t noticed and remembered. It absolutely should be brought up, but they may not have the time or desire to confront you.

Personally, I have no problem with confrontation, and I will be a jerk if I have to because I have a job to do. I don’t like doing that, and you don’t like being on the receiving end. Save us both the time and drama. Strive to be the Professional that makes a client think “Wow, he nailed it!” instead of the Amateur that makes the client think “Well, he completed items A, C and E but forgot B and D. Again. And now I have to either write it up or fix it myself when I have a mountain of other work to do. Splendid!”

One important point, however, that you may not realize: Sometimes — emphasis on sometimes — the sign of a job well done is the quiet, peaceful absence of problems. Everything flows smoothly, is exactly as expected, people are happy and there is no cause for complaint. Doing the job right simply may not bring open acknowledgement or kudos, but doing the job wrong is going to set off alarms that everyone notices. It took me many years to realize that, sometimes, lack of acknowledgement is something to take pride in. It’s not ideal and I try extremely hard to acknowledge and appreciate everything I can, but I have a lot to do and may not always be able to afford the time. Remembering this can keep you sane.

THE FOURTH COMMANDMENT

Thou Shalt Honor Thy Customer and Thy Reputation.

Amateur: “I’m just this guy that makes art. What’s customer service? If I make good art, that’s all that matters because that’s all they really want.”

Professional: “I’m a service provider and I take customer service seriously. I am an artist, but my success in that depends on creating art to my client’s exact specifications.”

Manager’s Insight: You are in the customer service business. Be responsive and make the client happy and maintain it.
A lot of artists coming from a studio environment don’t really have to worry about doing much else besides showing up and doing what’s asked of them. It’s usually hard for people to get fired for unsatisfactory performance, so a lot of annoying little habits and behaviors can get glossed over. (note: Everyone notices even if they don’t bring it up.)

It’s a lot like dating. You work out, dress well and try to get in “dating shape” so you can look as attractive as possible for potential mates. [Insert charming romantic comedy “how they met” story here, possibly starring Gerard Butler and Jennifer Lopez.] Then when you’re in a relationship, you let a few things slide because you’re safe. Contractors do this. Contractors should not do this.

This is the difference between being a contractor versus being employed full-time at a studio. As a contractor, you are ALWAYS dating. You are ALWAYS selling. You ALWAYS have to keep that standard of careful attention to detail, composure, and will to go the extra mile to make your client happy so you’ll keep working with them long-term. And even clients like flowers from time to time. (note: Please do not actually send clients flowers.)

THE FIFTH COMMANDMENT.

Thou Shalt Not Mock the Client with Feeble Protestations.

Amateur: “My dog ate my stylus!”

Professional: “I dropped the ball on this, and I will do my best to correct it.”

Manager’s Insight: I don’t want excuses, I want results. If you screwed up, be honest and let me know so I can plan for that. I’ve heard EVERY excuse. I know the difference between a reason and an excuse.

I’ve seen weird technical issues that are magically resolved when I try to step in to help.

Oh, you never got that email you had actually already replied to?

Wow, your wife\girlfriend DEMANDED that you nap through this deadline (true story!)

The list goes on. For my part, when I make a mistake, I own up to it. It sucks, it’s awkward, and I feel bad. But making lame excuses makes me look irresponsible, sloppy, and insults my client’s intelligence.

There is definitely a difference between an excuse and a valid reason. Sometimes it can be hard to tell the difference. But if enough of those stack up, that’s a red flag. It’s easy to think to yourself “These are all perfectly valid reasons! If they’re reasonable, they’ll totally understand and forgive me.” Sure, but the more mistakes there are the less I’ll ultimately trust you, valid or not. If I hear one more “It was an Act of God!” story…

Don’t be a mistake factory. But if you make one, just fix it. I don’t always really need to know the details of why, just that a mistake was made and that you’re on top of it now. Honestly, I just want results and honesty so I can understand the situation, troubleshoot as needed, adjust the schedule and allocate resources to keep production moving.

THE SIXTH COMMANDMENT.

Thou Shalt Start a Website and Find a Good Domain.

you@yourname.com email is professional. If you use webmail, Gmail only. Hotmail, Yahoo, MSN, etc look amateur.

Get a dot com. Second best is dot net.

Avoid weird TLDs (top level domains) if you can. Also avoid subdomains.

Bad example: “ieatpaper.iamaprofessionalartist.co.xxx.nz.abc.123.omg”

If you don’t use your real name, be simple. If you say the name aloud, can people find it on the first try?

Bad example: “Superdeliciousartistboythatmakesart.com/portfolio/lookatmeIamcreative!!11/”

Avoid internet slang.

Bad example: “lolwutplsbesrs.net”

Avoid bad spelling.

Bad example: “imaektehthreedeemodelz.net”

If you must hyphenate, use only one.

Bad example: “c-o-n-c-e-p-t-artist.com”

Avoid complicated words.

Bad example: “www.archaeologicalartisan.com”

Avoid unintentional words.

Bad example: www.FerrethAndJobs.com (yes, this is real, it’s a law firm)

If it takes longer than three seconds to speak aloud or explain, it’s too long.

Bad example: “It’s incompatenceingameduhvelopment.com, but ‘incompetence’ is spelled ‘i-n-c-o-m-p-a to be funny blah blah blah”

Don’t pick something offensive. If it has to do with drugs, sex, poop, communicable diseases or Nickelback, reconsider your life.

Bad example: “snotinmyhair.com”

Short and simple is best.

Good examples: “chrisholden.net,” “autodestruct.com,” and “twotongraphics.com”

THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT.

Thou Shalt Know and Love Thy Web Tools.

(but not the Biblical “know.”) (source:gamasutra)